Ssshhh... My body doesn't know we're not in the second trimester yet

I haven't thrown up in THREE DAYS now. That's a pretty big accomplishment at this point! Yesterday I ate 96 grams of protein -- the first time I've been able to eat 70 or more since my midwife told me that's my target number (which was about three weeks ago). And this morning I woke up, looked around my apartment, and decided everything needed to get cleaned. I dusted places I haven't seen in quite some time, and that I might not see again until we move in August. Zach will be happy to come home to a clean apartment for once after duty. Still sleepy, still moody, but I'm able to eat, and I get these lovely energy bursts that allow me to be productive :) I'm 11 weeks & 6 days (11w6d) right now, so over the next week or so, things should start feeling even more normal for me. I don't really look pregnant though, so I'm going to have to find a way to keep myself convinced that I am. The second trimester is when I really need to start gaining more weight, and as of right now I still fit into all my pants (even if I unbutton them when I sit down...). My 26th birthday is this Thursday, and that's also when we get to hear the heartbeat for the first time, which is probably going to be the coolest birthday present ever :) Zach might not be able to stop me from buying a home doppler system so I can listen to the heartbeat anytime I want. Hey, they're only $60-75, and I can keep it for use throughout this and future pregnancies, so it seems like a good investment to me! Especially since after Thursday I'll know how to find Little Bit myself. I didn't want to order it before this appointment for fear of not quite knowing what I was doing and working myself into a tizzy because I couldn't hear anything. Plus I really like the midwife we have our appointment scheduled with, and it's something I want to be able to share with her. That's gotta be one of the bigger perks of the job, is seeing new parents' faces light up at the first sound of their baby's heartbeat. Just wanted to do a quick update since it's been a few days. I still have to catch up on the ultrasound entry at some point, but I didn't want that to deter me from writing something today. Hope everyone's had a wonderful week, and has an amazing weekend!

Up close and personal with my internal anatomy

A long time ago I decided that I wanted to have a natural childbirth, preferably a waterbirth, at the Best Start Birth Center in San Diego. After a runaround with our insurance provider (Tricare, through the military), I called Best Start and asked them for help, since military medicine refused. (After spending 4 years using active duty medical benefits and almost 3 years now using dependent benefits, I'm about fed up with how their medical system works. But that's just me... And thousands of other unsatisfied customers. But anyway!) The lady at Best Start told me exactly who I needed to call, what I needed to say, and what I needed to do, and it worked like a charm! We got it all straightened out, and I was able to call back later that same day and book our first appointment. I think I took 7 pregnancy tests waiting for that day to come...

The appointment with our certified nurse midwife (CNM) was nothing like any doctor's appointment I've ever had at a hospital or clinic. It was so friendly and personal -- I just couldn't believe that medical care could be so helpful! We were able to joke around with her, ask questions and get personalized answers instead of textbook responses... It was amazing. I didn't even have to get undressed for my internal exam. I was wearing a skirt, so she just told me to take off my panties and get on the table. She gave me a little sheet to cover up with and did her thing. Zach stayed in the room and she told him it would probably be nice for me if he held my hand, because most women find internal exams to be awkward and uncomfortable. We carried on a conversation, she told me about everything she was seeing and explained the changes that were going on in my body, and then she handed me a mirror and told me to have a look! Zach asked if he could see too, and she told him to come down to her end of the table and take a look. It was just so comforting to have someone who wanted me to understand my body that well.

After that was finished we talked a little more, and I asked about something we were both curious about: delivering the baby. She confirmed that it's common at the birth center for the dads to be able to deliver the baby, and that really the role of the attending midwife is to just be there to monitor things and step in if she's needed, or go grab snacks, or whatever support the couple needs. Their philosophy is that birth is a special experience, and that it's more about the couple than anyone else, so they only intervene when necessary (and to check the baby's heartrate after the contractions). At some point I'll probably write a blog on why we chose a birthing center, and specifically water birth, but that's another entry for another time :) I just wanted to express how happy I am with the care I'm receiving from my CNMs at Best Start. Much better than I ever could have imagined from a hospital. We're thrilled.

Waking up to your wife shoving a pee-stick in your face & changing your life: Priceless

Zach and I were vacationing in New York Feb. 25 - March 1 for a relative's black-tie birthday shindig when Zach started suspecting something. He kept telling me that my body looked different, and that I smelled different, and that something about that smell just made him want to protect me. He swore I was pregnant; I swore he was wrong. I wasn't even "late" yet -- how could he have any idea?

After hearing him say it for a few days in a row, I decided I might as well take a home pregnancy test and shut him up. Lord knows I wanted a baby, and hearing him say that over & over was just setting me up for disappointment, I just knew it. We made it back to San Diego the evening of March 1, and when I woke up March 2, I snuck off to the bathroom to use a First Response Early Response pregnancy test. I needed to dash those hopes before they set in too solidly and got me in trouble. So much for dashing hopes though, 'cause that second line showed up QUICK. And bold. I couldn't believe it.

I had always hoped that when I found out we were going to have a baby, that I would fix some special dinner, or plan an evening out, or make something cute and creative to give to him as a way of telling him. Nope. Why did I ever think I would have self-restraint?

I ran to the bedroom and flopped on the bed, on my knees, right next to him. "Hey. Hey. Hey, hey, hey. Hey. Hey. HEY." He rolled over and squinted at me. I'm pretty sure the test was in his face before his eyes were fully open. He stared at it for a second, unaffected, because he was still just trying to process being awake. I could tell when he figured it out, because he went from looking sleepy and irritated to just blank.

"Are you pregnant?"

"YES!"

Then the blank went to ecstatic, and much hugging and kissing ensued. I don't think he even made it out of bed to pee before we started calling people and sharing our good news. Apparently neither of us is good at keeping secrets! So even though he knew I was pregnant before I even knew, that's the story of how I confirmed his suspicion that we were expecting our first child. Grow, little one, grow! I can't wait to meet you this November!